Counselling and Creativity : An Approach to Individuation: January 2011

Friday, January 07, 2011

Only You - Dating Online

So as we move in to 2011 and some may be thinking about forging new relationships, rekindling old ones or yearning for rich change in existing ones, is it time to focus on happiness. Moreover, how can we make our relationships much richer? Perhaps a good starting point is to not take things personally, because the unconscious is personal, isn’t it, as Freud may have once postulated. So when we remember unpleasantness of things that have happened, are we then returning to things ‘infantile’? In other words, could there now be new insight on the unpleasantness that we can learn from, even if it is just simply a new learning of what we don’t want in a relationship and thus concentrate and act on the change within.

With the internet becoming more and more a part of our lives can we really and truly make contact online in terms of forging richer intimate relationships? There seems to be a notion that this is possible although some may argue not really. My view is how will you know that the picture you have is the person you are communicating with, or the replies you may receive are really from that person and that they are genuine? Only time will tell, however, do check things out thoroughly. It’s only human to want to be in a relationship, it’s innate, isn’t it, that drive towards another person, whether it may be libidinal or psychological.

I wonder what Freud’s take would have been on online dating? Would he have veered off into a new theory of illusions of a ‘digital relationship’ or ‘cyberspace relationship’ and the neurology of its processes, if there is such a relationship?

I am quite intrigued as to whether a person could be drawn into a world of phantasy, oscillating between impulses of whether a person is there on not there, producing dynamics of a drive to keep the contact going in the hope of falling in love, romance or just simply feeding a human need for admiration. Whatever the goal, achieving psychological contact and being understood by another person is a life long persuit of both pleasure and unpleasure, as I once found with this exercise!

Only You - Dating Online

Out of curiosity, I make contact online
With only you
I scan all your pictures to make contact
With only you
I dreamed of contact
With only you
I got excited to make contact
With only you
I seem to have made contact ...

In reality without a real "exchange"
What may be incompatible may only
Be a reflection of human infallibility
With only you.

(c) Jennifer Hooper 2011

Saturday, January 01, 2011

A New Dawn 1st January 2011

Dear Readers

It’s a new dawn and how is everyone "feeling"? Hope you are all well. There will be lots of exciting things to write about in 2011, so I look forward to your visits. I had been busy all last year and there was a mad rush over the past few months to reduce my ‘to do lists’ to put closure on 2010. Happy to say the most stubborn limiting beliefs and actions have been conquered and it’s so easy to achieve when a person can say to themself “I can” instead of “I can’t”, because if you can't you probably won’t.

What’s on the agenda then, building a client base, back on regular lectures down at the Freud Museum to explore even further Jung, Klein, Bion and other contemporaries, close a few contracts and create a happy work life balance. I say create because this is a very important concept. I ask, is a person really able to create the life that they truly want? I think it is possible, even though there may be a few blocks on the way that could be blown into the universe if a person chooses to live more in the now.

The concept of the now seems to be a really hot topic in mental health and wellbeing these days and it does make sense when we consider the reality of the social or unsocial world we live in. There is also the notion of what is real, but for the internal representation of each individual! It gets complicated doesn’t it? However, even though 'external reality' is permanently present, because it is what is really going on in our environment, it may cause a disruption of energy in our body and mind by our responses to it. Furthermore, this does not have to concretely mean in all cases that we cannot bounce back. For me bouncing back is about acceptance that something external to me might be wrong but I don’t have to view myself as a person or a thing that is itself 'wrong'. For we are all beautiful aren’t we, and we just simply make mistakes, some of us more than others. And I include myself here when I say also that some of us just simply have to explore our life’s journey at some point to understand it a bit better, don’t we.

Moving this to one side and on a spiritual level though, who really is to blame for deteriorating world conditions? I think an examination of the scriptures will soon provide the answer. Now why am I wondering what may have lay at the heart of what Freud and Jung spent a life time researching, that is, at the base root, the core origins of human and mental conflict?

Courtesy The Jung Page

Reference

'Psychological Theory of Types', Modern Man in Search of a Soul, p. 105

"When we think, it is in order to judge or to reach a conclusion, and when we feel it is in order to attach a proper value to something...".

The Jung Page, Reflections on Psychology, Culture and Life, [ visited 1 January 2010] http: //www.cgjungpage.org/

Jennifer Hooper MBACP
NCFE, PG Dip:MA in Counselling
& Master Therapeutic & Wellbeing Coach

The Editor

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Dear Readers,

You may be wondering when am I going to finish editing my book, I have been talking about. The thing is, it’s such a precious autobiography account of a story I want to share as interesting, educational and practical for lovers of poetry and psychology, it's been quite a special project of creating a kind of a fusion of the two disciplines in a creative way. I had parked the project temporarily to finish my Continuing Professional Development for 2010 and having achieved this, I will now resume my passion for writing. I hope now to be placing the manuscript safetly in the hands of someone who can tell me not just "it's a facinating read..." but will also direct me to a publisher, even though I have not ruled out self-publishing! I guess this takes us onto how my reading went on Freud’s Three Essays on the Theory of Sexuality 1905? Fascinating to say the least and I dare say, postulations probably amounting to the impossible to those in the 18th Century who thought it preposterous that a child could ever have a sex life. It seems though,this was the very investigation that Freud started to uncover from both the light and dark side, which may have later influenced him to change some of his theories, maybe to avoid fierce debate and/or being unpopular, who really knows (Freud 1905). Nevertheless, his neurological and later psychotherapy approaches to discovery does seem to lend itself to a linear explanation to how innocent and precious child development is and how much it needs to be preserved for normal and social development. I guess when he talks of “repression”, that is, burying unwanted thoughts or feelings, he does have a point about humans doing this as a coping mechanism when confronted with unpleasant earlier memories.

Moving on to the next point, now will I get to read his full psychological works in 2011! That’s the challenge. However, I have set myself and even more challenging goal for 2011, that of reviewing at a more researched level, Carl G. Jung, probably Freud's earliest contemporary. I am excited already knowing that Carl saw the unconscious as a repository of unpleasantness too and also one for “positivity”. Maybe that’s how we know that all learnings are unconscious. Thank goodness we have the power to change or dispose of unpleasantness by responding differently to problems. A modern practical application, in this recession I would say, is it’s time to be resilient about our pasts and maintain this consistency for our futures, by empowering ourselves now to deal artfully with problems, because we know there will always be a new one, don’t we.

Ladies and gentlemen,

As you think about going into the New Year, you can let go of all the unpleasantness that you may be holding on to, because it’s not worth the energy is it. Yes, time is precious and so are you and you are so much more precious than problems aren’t you. So as you focus here on yourself and what you want to achieve in 2011, it feels good doesn’t it to know that you can fill your unconscious with “positivity”, good learnings, thoughts and feelings to take you through probably another tough year. And you will get through it won’t you, and you will remember that there will always be another problem that you can blow away. So now you will concentrate on becoming skillful, confident and ready to take the challenge to remain mentally strong for yourself and your loved ones for the next 365 days and beyond. Good. Now that you are ready, take a deep breath in and then out and and as you blow out, blow all those old problems out into the universe and enjoy your life. 123,WIDE AWAKE, WIDE AWAKE ... I do have a pet bird I need to chat to now, whilst all the fireworks are going off... (c) Jennifer Hooper 2010. 31.12.10 at midnight.

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Are you ready to do an affirmation today? If you are feeling relatively healthy and you don’t have a head injury, how about tapping a problem away into the universe that might have been left over from New Year’s Eve? You can try it even if you just have a common normal headache you want to shift. Just tap the top of your head very lightly and say “even though I know I have this problem, I deeply and profoundly accept and love myself.” The more specific you are the better it could work. Example, “even though .... , I deeply and profoundly accept and love myself”. Try it for about 5 minutes and allow the energy to flow and balance itself. Great. If you have an bigger problem, you can give me a ring for a private consultation on 0208 868 7287.

How about starting 2011 off calm and relaxed? Great. If you are feeling relatively well, sit in a comfortable chair and breathe in through your nose and exhale through your mouth in cycles, for about 3 mins. Good. Get that energy flowing around your body. You can do this next bit with your eyes closed if you want. As you close your eyes think of one of the best things that happened to you in 2010, can you remember that experience, how lovely and wonderful it was, really go into the memory of the good feeling and capture the feeling. Once you fully experienced the feeling, hold the feeling for as long as you can and then OPEN YOUR EYES, then do the "breathing" exercise again. Have a nice day now. You can always do some research on the internet on ‘HA Breathing’ if you want, it has been around for centuries!

By creativity you can be the best that you can ever be, the person you want to be and in being you can live. For life is for living and enjoying and not forgetting that we are all responsible for ourselves and in taking responsibility the least we can do is want the same for others. Can't we. (c) Jennifer Hooper 2010.

Counselling and Creativity : An Approach to Individuation

Friday, January 07, 2011

Only You - Dating Online

Saturday, January 01, 2011

A New Dawn 1st January 2011

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